October

Did you know that tomatillos grow until they explode? I noticed that today as I pulled the last plant out of the greenhouse. I think that's probably the coolest way to die - grow until you explode.

A lot has happened this past month. The month of change.

Here's a quick summary of October:

Marika harvest something like 1500 lbs of winter squash- we pulled up the remaining squash plants and made a giant compost pile- pulled up all the irrigation before a heavy frost came- pulled out the sweet pea plants- prepared the upper greenhouse for lettuce transplants- transplanted lettuce and spinach- harvested all the green tomatoes and wrapped them in newspaper for their final chance at ripening- pulled all the tomato plants out of the greenhouses- pulled up the dhalia flowers and stored the bulbs in the barn- moved the movable greenhouse with the tractor (crazy to see a greenhouse move)- started carrying cedar logs Jan cut in the woods to the new property for fence posts- started doing chicken duty for the first time- attended a few of Mary's classes on "Farming as a Business"- killed Cocky the rooster. Yeah!

The saddest thing that's happened is that Yoko and Renae finished their apprenticeship and have headed off to new experiences. Since I came during the middle of the apprenticeship, I plan to stay through the winter into the next season. Mary says that if I make it through the winter I'll be the first one! Ahhh! What Mary doesn't know is that I actually love being alone and relish in quiet time. There is definitely the feeling of a black hole on the farm without Yoko and Renae around...but there is also a feeling of rest and calmness.

I don't think I have ever felt this calm in my life before. Everyday is a day of internal reflection and listening. For the first time in a long time I'm hearing myself again. And I'm happy to realize that I'm the same person I've always been! Same heart...same dreams and passions. It's pretty exciting actually.

Growing up I always talked to myself in the mirror (wow. I'm confessing this on a public blog. weird.) I think that was probably the best thing I could have done growing up...because it meant that I learned a lot about myself. I worked through problems on my own...saying things like "Well Nat, look at it this way..." and never once did I leave a conversation unhappy. I haven't done this in many many many years. Until now. I talk to myself a lot...and I listen to myself a lot. And I am recognizing all the things I'm fortunate for (which is pretty much my whole life...so wow!) and being thankful for them. And lastly, I'm just falling in love with myself, which honestly makes me the happiest person each day! Ha!

I bet at this point you are all thinking I'm going crazy in my colorful trailer out in the woods. Maybe I am. But at least I'm happy.

PS. Mary and Jan had their annual Halloween party. I dressed as the Ghost of Cocky the Rooster...back to haunt Jan. Look at the pic below.

PPS. I've put new pictures on my flikr account...check em out.